Hands
by Felarof
Summary: She couldn't bare to look at him. Not like this. ONE SHOT anime, episode 25 review please!


He stood so still, so stock still, she could barely look. The way his hands were buried deep within his pockets. The way his hat was pulled so far down his face that she couldn't see his eyes. The way his uniform was unusually crisp, or the way his hair was swept away. She couldn't look.

They were the only one's left. Every one else had turned away, every one else had gone with out another parting thought. The grass was green, sickeningly so, and the sky was so infinitely blue. But she could see by the way that he removed his shaking hand from his pockets that everything was in shades of blue.

Her golden eyes flew over him, what was she to do? For the first time in a long while, Riza Hawkeye was genuinely stumped over what to say. Over what to say to a man like Roy Mustang.

He had onyx black eyes, and jet black hair. He was a man in the military, so she rarely ever saw him out of uniform. He was tall, dark, and she had to admit, rather handsome. The three golden traits that would keep him so favorable with the ladies. He was strong too, and a good commander.

His personality was at best frustrating, and at worst, unsanitary, but he held his head high and he held it proud. He was a good man, a haunted man, and he deserved every word that was said about him, both good and bad. His sarcasm was daunting, but the way he teased Edward Elric was admittedly amusing. Riza grit her teeth, perhaps that was what was most unsettling about his current self. All of it, the spark, the charm, all of it was gone.

Riza pouted her lips and shifted her weight from one foot to another. She watched as he leant to one side, his now pale face staring almost lifelessly at the grave. More than anything she just wished it would rain. Let it rain so we can stand here in our irony. But looking up the skies were clear, and the sun was bright. There were so many things that they could be doing, but somehow standing at that grave felt right.

Riza lifted her hand, and opened her mouth in preparation to say something. She even took a step forward, but the expression fell from her face and her hand dropped to her side as her commanding officer took no notice of her. Of all the emotions that she felt, she couldn't pick which she felt most.

To Maes, a man she had not known too much of but had liked what she'd known, she felt anger towards him for leaving. Frustration- why didn't he say goodbye? Remorse- at the state he'd left his family. And absolutely flabbergasted at the outrageous theories of what happened to him. The whole situation was so bizarre, she just expected him to pop out from over the hill, face smiling, hand waving, words saying 'hey you guys! What are you just standing around for?' or something dumb like that.

Roy, however, was the more complicated matter. Feelings, and intentions towards him had been complicated enough before this happened. As a superior officer he had a certain air of authority around her, but for whatever reason he had always treated her differently. Riza Hawkeye was not the kind of woman that he left early to go to shows with, she didn't fix her hair into elaborate proportions, or smother her face in make-up. She didn't wear dressy gowns, or arrange flowers.

Riza Hawkeye tied her hair back in a means that was appropriate for work. Riza Hawkeye would never waste her money on something so vain as make-up. Riza Hawkeye didn't wear dresses, she didn't usually wear normal clothes, she wore plain, plain uniforms. Riza Hawkeye spent her days firing gun after gun after gun. Flowers were an inconvenient waste of time.

There was only one thing that First Lieutenant Hawkeye had in common with those arrogant and vain women, and that was the way she felt about Colonel Mustang. She would never openly admit to herself, even less another person, but she was jealous of the other women. She didn't understand what things about them caught his eye, but at the same time, nor did she want to.

She thought of Roy Mustang in a way that no one ever would. Colonel, Mustang, Sir, Roy: they were all completely different people. Riza had only fallen for one. His name was Roy and she had met him in an other world called Ishbal and she had sworn herself to him since.

Riza had seen him at his happiest when he finally became a state alchemist. Most amused when he taunted Edward Elric. Most stressed when the Fuhrer came for his visits. She had seen him at his worst on the battlefield, a one off she assumed. But as she stood there looking at him, his face clouded with memories, fears, god knows what she realized that there was a whole new level there.

There was violent debating in her head. Her feelings, his feelings, the outcome of this whole situation. It was a giant debacle. Restlessly she shifted her feet, feeling the softness of the grass beneath her boot. It was calming somehow, if Roy would just stop thinking, he'd feel it too.

Plucking up her courage she picked up her feet and stepped over to him. Her feet felt like lead and as she stood beside him she couldn't bare to face him. Her eyes bored into the carvings on the stone. 'Maes Hughes'…

There was a soft rustle as Roy turned his head to face hers, the hat that he had kept on his head for so long was in his hands. She had been thinking too much to even notice. Her eyes flicked to his for a moment and they caught.

That was the most unsettling, most uncomfortable, longest moment of her life. The hurt that filled his eyes was deep, Roy Mustang was, as unbearable as it was to say, a broken man. He wouldn't heal easily, and that hurt Riza too. His eyes were steady, he wouldn't cry. He wasn't a crying type, but she could feel his distress signals on high alert.

He shifted his hands, and then his feet. Finally he brought himself to say something. They were the first words he'd said in hours, and they stung. "I don't want you to wait with me anymore.."

Something caught in her throat. Her mouth opened, and closed. She shifted her head and stared at him in his obscurity. It must have been rather obvious, because he looked momentarily stunned before he could bring himself to clarify. "I don't want you to see me like this. I don't want you to have to stand here all night because I have to.."

She relaxed slightly, that was the thing about Riza, she always assumed things for the worst. She calmed her senses and looked at him again, "I want to."

That was her chance to surprise Roy. He looked away. He looked to the grave, to the ground, then back to her. Her hair was pulled back, her face was sharp, and her eyes were undeniably beautiful. So big and easy to get lost in. And he loved their colour. He was rather taken with how loyal she was. Or rather, he was rather taken by her.

She smiled a little and then looked at her feet. Roy still watching her. His eyes blinked once, twice, "It'll be a while, are you sure?" She looked at him, her face smiling and warm.

"I wouldn't have expected anything less, Roy Mustang."

His turn to smile. It came easily and gratefully. A change from how sad he'd felt. It felt so good to smile. It felt so right. He looked back to the grave and Riza could feel his gaze pulling off her. She sighed, relieved. Perhaps, standing here, wasn't such a bad idea after all.

The grave in itself was rather plain, just another stone. Just another man dead. But to Roy, and to Riza she supposed, Maes Hughes wasn't just another man. Maes Hughes was a husband. He was a father. He was a good man, and a best friend. A very best friend. She wondered if he'd known just how much he meant to Roy. Knowing him he did. Of course he did.

She contented herself with these thoughts, thinking about things, everything, and anything in between. She thought about life, the future, the present, the past. It wasn't until she felt a gloved hand slip into hers that she realized just how much time had past. Startled, she jumped slightly, and looked to Roy.

Roy stared at the grave, a hopeful smile across his features. Riza looked to her hand- well their hands now- his white glove incasing hers. His hand was so much bigger than hers, she'd noticed, but she'd never really thought about it before. His hand, his glove was comforting, and as she relaxed and returned his grasp she was amused at how warm it was.

This didn't mean anything, really. She had known him for ages, she knew him the best now, and she realized that she was going to have to make up for the loss of Hughes, and she was willing to take that responsibility on in full. But maybe, just maybe, Riza was beginning to think, that Roy Mustang, might just like her a little bit better than those notoriously vain women that he entertained at night.

FIN.

--my first royai. Hoped you liked! It was set in the anime, obviously, at Hughe's funeral! Please review, it makes me happy, and encourages me to write more! Thanks for taking the time to read!


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